Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Rating the Brazilian Fans' Breakdowns



At this point it was only 3-0, so it's kinda reasonable that this girl is still in the denial phase. Almost as though she doesn't quite believe whats going on. Not a breakdown persé, but she's definitely looking for answers and she can't find any. Just no explanation for what's happening, and she isn't about to get one when Brazil concedes 2 more in the next 5 minutes. If she's feeling depressed and vulnerable tonight, she knows where to find me.

Breakdown: 3/10



This chick put up a valiant effort. For a few seconds it genuinely looked like she was going to be able to hold those tears in and when she pulls here head back you think that moment of weakness has passed. Well, think again mother fucker. All of a sudden the crushing weight of what a 7-1 home loss in the World Cup semi-finals means to her entire country all comes crashing down on her and she turns into a shaking mess. 

Breakdown: 6/10

This one actually kinda hit close to home. These are the unrestrained, virgin tears of a kid who's just had his heart ripped out and curb stomped right in front of him. When you're this old you haven't felt the crushing disappointment of your favorite team's defeat yet. This kid has no experience with that kind of emptiness and depression. This was probably the first time in his life that the kid genuinely cared about a team, and his expectations were as high as the sky. The way Brazil were acting he probably thought they'd coast to the World Cup and it'd be dancing and samba for the next four years. Well, welcome to reality kid, you just got a live show of your team suffering their worst loss in their history, at home, on the biggest stage of the world. It's very likely this kid will never recover. He'll have emotional scarring and attachment issues for the rest of his life.

Breakdown: 9/10


The only reason I felt this merited a higher score than the kid was the pure, unadulterated despair in this woman's eyes. The only thing I could think of when I saw this was in the Fellowship of the Ring when Gandalf dies and the fellowship is in such grief they can't even comprehend what happened/understand how to continue on. Like I don't know if Brazil will be able to function as a country after this loss. Their soccer team defined them, and now that they've been shredded into a million pieces right in front of their faces I'm not sure they'll all be able to go into work tomorrow morning and continue living their lives normally. This woman's despair is so profound it's honestly kinda horrifying. The devastation of Brazil all neatly summarized in one 5 second gif.

Breakdown: 10/10

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